Ricky Williams admitted he had an urge to smoke some weed, and Lisa
Horne wonders what college football nation has fought the urge to do.
Miami Dolphins’ running back, Ricky Williams, recently admitted having
to fight the urge to take a hit on a blunt. Or bong. Whatever floats
his boat. The team was on a bye, and he was free to do whatever he
wished.
He told the Miami Herald that when the Dolphins had a bye,
“automatically your mind, which is so constrained since training camp
began … says, ‘I’m free, what can I do?”‘
It’s amazing that he thinks about his freedom when he has already been
officially caught “free” four times in the NFL. But surely, those were
accidents, and he has been “cured,” right?
“I’d be lying if I said I’m never going to do it again after I’m
done,” he said. “I don’t know. I don’t spend much time thinking about
it.”
But he does spend time thinking about it. In fact, the second he has
any kind of freedom he’s already deciding which munchies he’ll be
stocking up on before he expands his mind. And lungs.
Williams, by his own free admission to the press, has become the
official poster-child for smoking dope. Not that there’s anything
wrong with that. (Seinfeldfans, sorry, but it’s a great line.)
But hey, Williams likes his dope. Williams lives for dope. Williams
will be smoking dope when he retires. That’s his deal. It’ll probably
be legal by then anyways. Move to Cali, Ricky, we wouldn’t notice one
more stoner there.
Charlie Weis is probably resisting the urge…to punch me in the mouth
after I said his team would not win nine games. Six more to go
Charlie, and have had it, big guy.
Chase Daniel is fighting the urge to clear some mantle space for some
new hardware. Hold off, young man, D-Mac and Vince Young did the same
housecleaning and it didn’t work out.
Pete Carroll is fighting the urge to call up Norm Chow, and offer him
double whatever the powder blue is paying him. Oh hell, whatever he
wants.
SEC fans probably are resisting the urge to call me an SEC-hater
because I think some teams in that conference are ranked too high.
Dang it! Last weekend was kind of a damper, wasn’t it?
Saban is probably resisting the urge to talk about his tough path.
Then again, it worked for Les. Nick, we await your speech with open
arms and speakers. I’m listening.
Is this the year Mangino talks about his tough path? Is he resisting
the urge? Any urge?
Phil Fulmer is resisting the urge….oh stop, Phil can’t resist an
urge. Phil has a coach-for-life contract. Well, not really, but ask
any Vols fan about Phil’s extension and Rocky Top will be by replaced
with Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Penn State fans are fighting the urge to scream anything remotely
close to “Miami in January.” They know better, don’t they? Michigan
awaits.
South Carolina fans are fighting the urge to boycott games, but
college football would be a vacuum without “Go Cocks Go,” wouldn’t it?
USC fans are fighting the urge to take Oregon and the 16.5 points
against USC. Don’t give into the Dark Side, unless you want to make
some coin this Saturday.
Touchdown Jimmy Clausen is fighting the urge to rent a white Hummer
again and hold a press conference saying, “OK, now let the hype
begin.”
Longhorns’ fans are resisting the urge to make their uniforms more
orange and less burnt-looking, because so far, nobody is paying
attention to them.
The Idaho Vandals’ fans are resisting the urge to boycott all Vandals’
games because their cheerleaders’ uniforms were deemed too short and
risqué. Dang, those poor folks have nothing to look forward to,
do they?
Raiders fans are resisting the urge to hire some little men in white
coats and have Al Davis committed.
Me? I’m resisting the urge to drink some of that Big XII Kool-Aid. It
looks pretty tasty—damn tasty. There are different flavors:
Sooner Red, Burnt Orange, Mizzou Black, and the always-refreshing
Kansas Blue.
I don’t know if I can fight it. I’ll do my best. But on Saturdays, I’m
free. And, sometimes these urges can’t be stopped.
Something tells me there’s going to be a lot of urges and hopefully
the result is a 12,500 article campaign on the Bleacher Report where
we expose the NCAA and the Bowl system for what it is and demand a
playoff as we say NO to 6-6 teams in blowl games with the losers being
less than .500 on the season. 26 stars and 4 POTD’s.
Mitch- with ya on the bowl stuff…and they added more bowls, so you
too can be a loser in your conference, but beat 4 cupcakes in non-
conference play, and be rewarded for beating two cellar-dwellers. It’s
the BCS way!
That’s understandable, but it’s basically the truth. But you have
bragging rights now. The Cowboys will never beat the Skins at Texas
Stadium ever again.
Lisa, remember that the SEC always beats up on the SEC, and then goes
and wins the big one. It ain’t over till it’s over. But we don’t think
you hate us….you just like riling us up.
Thanks for the pick GG. I don’t like riling ya up…I’m completely
jealous. I’ll explain in a later post…it’s been building!
Lisa, this is a great article. I wrote an article about Ricky Williams
and his temptation as Breaking News but it was also to express my
opinion. Please feel free to look at the article.
Yeah…the soccer moms had a meeting and decided it was a no-go. I
thought their unis were cute. Seriously. I see less flesh at the mall!
yea – i saw this, and wanted to pass it on to you, but you got to it
first
was it J-kimmel in his ESPY’S monologue, who told – that it is time
they stop testing Ricky for pot – and test pot for Ricky ….
liked this one a lot – i like em all, but for the ones in which you
get too technical
That sounds like a line I heard on some VH1 “I love Best Fantabulous
something” show once.
Some comedian said, “McJagger was recently blood tested and believe it
or not they actually found some blood in his heroin stream.”
and – why is this SEC hating – i dont understand that (am learning,
and hence i’ll ask some basic ques soimetimes Lise)
It wuld take to long to explain…but I’ll put it in soccer
terms…imagine the La Liga screaming “La Liga” everytime one of their
teams won, even though most of the fans screaming it were not fans of
the winning team? The La Liga fans will scream it, even though their
own team stinks because they at least can feel superior knowing the
Liga won.
hah, thats so odd, thats like saying, am proud EPL won – even though
am a Man U fan – it is Chelsea who actually won it for the EPL – and
am celebrating, thats weird, but thanks
may be Man U is not a good example – may be a 3rd rated team like –
Middlesboro – OK gotcha
– and hey – i have absolutely no probl with stats and nos. I only read
your generic articles because am still not cognizant enough to
understand the X’s and O’s of football – but thats my problem. I am
sure you have an audience – the hard core audience who dont mess
around
if i wanna write about Rodge, I would write about him on a macro and a
micro scale too – the slams and numbers as well as the basic mechanics
on why his forehand is obscenely elegant and powerful
Don’t agree with him…he’s just sucking up to me because he’s my
guest picker this week….picks will be posted tomorrow. 🙂
Yeah but they are undefeated in conference play! (who cares if they
haven’t played any Big XII teams yet?)
Ask Missy State how beating most of your cupcakes and have a .500
record or below conference record can get you in a bowl. Ain’t college
football great?
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